Day 13

Good afternoon all,

It looks like a beautiful sunny day outside and then you step out and it's bloody freezing :(
Today’s is interesting blog is quite interesting. It has to be a picture of something you hate and there are a few things I hate about the way I look, about certain foods and what people choose to do. I decided to do something a little personal though as I bare all in these blogs and share everything with you all. I might as well do this blog on something I hate about my body. Something I usually try to cover up and hide as I dislike them that much.
So here is today’s blog:


A Picture Of Something You Hate:-



This is a picture of nail clubbing. I think in some patients one of the physical signs of cystic fibrosis is clubbing of both the toe and fingernails. Digital clubbing is a condition in which the tips of fingers or toes have a large amount of excess tissue. This results in the nail bed taking on a curved appearance. Looking at the hand from the side can easily recognize the rounding of fingertips.
The precise cause of this condition hasn’t ever been defined I don’t think, however, I know that it also occurs in people with other serious lung disease such as emphysema, lung cancer, or bronchiectasis. Apparently it’s thought that the formation of the excess tissue has something to do with the body's imbalance of proteins that stimulate muscle growth.
Fingernail clubbing is usually present throughout a person's life. It is not an accurate gauge of the severity of lung damage in cystic fibrosis patients. The extent of the clubbing is different for almost every individual, and doesn't progress as the disease progresses. There is no way to treat or reverse the clubbing of nails, but it is also a benign symptom.
I’ve always been aware that my nails were different however when I got into juniors at primary school people picked up on a little more and I wasn’t particularly picked on but they’d just mention that my nails were different and obviously kids will be kids as they don’t know any better so my nails often got referred to being the same as ‘witches nail’
I was only young though and as I got on with everyone and nobody was ever ‘bullying’ or saying it nastily it didn’t really bother me. I usually laughed and told them they best be nice to me or I’d use my ‘witch nails’ to put a spell on them and then we’d all laugh ☺

Then I remember once in school a beautician had come in and a few of us were lucky enough to have a special treatment. We could choose from having a hand massage or having our nails done. I decided I wanted my nails painted as all my friends were also having this done and only the lads tended to have the hand massage. I walked into the room; bare in mind I was in year 6 so this I was around the age of 10. She smiled and asked what color I’d like. She then lifted my hand and was staring at my nails. She asked what was wrong with them. I told her nothing. Remember I was ten and they were normal to me!
She just continued to stare at them as she was putting some moisturizer on my hands and then asked if I was sure there was nothing wrong with them. I got quite upset about it and just got up and walked out. I went to the bathroom and stared at my nails for till it was time for dinner.
Ever since that say I’ve just been really shy and sensitive about my nails and anyone who comments on them. I know it’s silly and I shouldn’t take it to heart but I can’t help it. That stupid girl who had just come out of college really knocked my bloody confidence as far as my nails go.



As you can see from the picture, (which I am hating putting up but might as well bare everything right?), my nails are quite severely clubbed and that means I cant wear acrylic nails or anything like that.
So I hate my nails.

Take Care, Soph xoxo

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